|I got Black Friends Homie!|
In case anyone missed the memo, Justin Bieber is black. Get that black! You see, he hangs with Drake, Usher, Lil Wayne and Will Smith and those are his "black fairy godmothers". The king of white privilege runs in line for his honorary nigga pass, saying “Any time I am filling out paperwork that requires me to list my race I always check the black box. I have always felt like a black boy trapped in a white body. Race is not just skin color. Every thing about my style, music, and my entire way of life was influenced by black people,” he continued. “I am considering getting my skinned darkened so my outside can match how I feel inside.” He goes on to say, “If I were a racist, it would be against white people, not black,” he concluded. “From here on out my race will be officially listed as black.”
|I'm Black on the Inside!|
You are a caricature of a real person, you are the real life lead character from Malibu's Most Wanted, Brad Gluckman. I expect your next album to be called "Malibooty" and a bunch of Paris Hilton clone people in juicy couture, with fake boobs, carry dogs in purses, sporting medieval weapons talking about their "gats" pretending it's south central while drinking a late'. Bitch, you are from Canada. Last time I checked, there aren't that many gangs or hoods in Canada. I'm sure meth is prominent and sniffing a beavers ass, I don't know what the hell else to do there, which is probably why you won't go back there. They don't even help fight wars, so they are as useless as Switzerland or Mexico. All Canadians are good for is bacon and hockey and that cute mountie uniform. You and Drake aren't thugs, hard, gangsters, threatening or sexy, most importantly Justin, you aren't black. Our honorary cracka ass crackas are Eminem, Jon B., Justin Timberlake, and Robin Thicke. You FAIL, WE REVOKE YOUR SELF IMPOSED HONORARY PASS.
Nicki, Nicki, Nicki...somehow won an award for Best Female Hip Hop Artist. What am I saying, this is the BET Awards, this is like the Special Olympics of award shows and truth be told, no one else is rapping, let me say, no one else is commercial that whites and gays love, and Nicki does rap, sometime. Anyhoo, our video hoe barbie gave an acceptance speech to throw shade at the current "rap" artist that has the #1 song in the country because she has writers (only god knows why people listen to that crap either). "What I want the world to know about Nicki Minaj is when you hear Nicki Minaj spit, Nicki Minaj wrote it," she told the audience, adding that she meant no offense. "No, no, no shade, no, no, no shade." Did you call out Rihanna when you two did your tone def, auto tuned duet? Rihanna skype's her vocals and wouldn't know a pen and paper unless a penis was attached to it and neither one of you can sing without mac pro-tools. Did you call out Beyonce? Beyonce "borrows" from unknown, unsigned artists, but she doesn't write literally, either, I don't think she can.
|Now, I'm Real!|
|I'm Real This Time, I Promise!|
|Bitch, I'm Real!|