Thursday, June 30, 2011

Chris Hanson- to Catch a Moron

Chris, would you mind taking a seat at the kitchen table while we ask you a few questions?

Week after week we watched in delight as unsuspecting idiotic perverts arrived to be ambushed by Chris Hanson's chat logs and the police handcuff's. Increduously, these people kept showing up over and over, after they saw the show, and we laughed and mocked these men for being so stupid. It seems Chris Hanson himself has fallen victim to his own tricks and has been caught up on camera cheating on his wife. Sadly, there was no girl dressed in a bad wig yelling from around the corner, telling him to fix a cup of sweet tea or the staged stale plate of cookies. Chris likes to eat at the Four Seasons with a blond PYT young enough to be his daughter. Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids and Snoop Dog.

He lives in Conneticut and his trick or girlfriend resides in Florida. Remember a similiar line on the show, Well, Chris, you traveled a great distance just to be with your intended partner -- like the sex offenders. And, Chris, you lied to the ones around you (like your wife & kids) just to be with your intended partner -- like the sex offenders. Also, Chris, you acted against the dominant cultural morals/mor­es (monogamy and; fidelity) -- just like the sex offenders. We know, Chris, that your "secret" was based on your unrestrain­ed sexual drives -- just like the sex offenders. We assume, Chris, that you intended to portray yourself to others (your audience) as something that you are not -- just like the sex offenders. We are certain, Chris, that your wanton and selfish behavior has deeply harmed others (your wife especially­) -- just like the sex offenders. After the movies FATAL ATTRACTION, THE COLOR PURPLE, and the various Tyler badly acted Perry homo thug in drag and Mufasa-esque Beyonce fatal attraction knockoff flicks, I thought no man in his right mind would have affairs anymore.

This is funny, not as funny as the guy that wanted to perform sex acts with the girl and a cat that appeared on the show, but still pretty comical.

Sooooooo..­.when you kill the original vampire, all the people that have been turned are then released from vampirism, is that right? I'm going to have a­d think about this.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Thank God Michelle Bachmann isn't Black

That's the only positive thing that I have to say in regards to her. I hate that we share a gender and a profession, but she sounds like a lobotomized beauty queen when she speaks and you know how stupid they are. Today, she decided to expand on her founding father's working tirelessly to end slavery vampire statement. ABC's George Stephanopoulos asked the conservative congresswoman to address the statement, noting that many of the country's Founding Fathers, including Thomas Jefferson and George Washington, in fact had slaves and that slavery wasn't abolished until the Civil War. Here's an excerpt of the exchange that went down:

Bachmann: Well you know what’s marvelous is that in this country and under our constitution, we have the ability when we recognize that something is wrong to change it. And that’s what we did in our country. We changed it. We no longer have slavery. That’s a good thing. And what our Constitution has done for our nation is to give us the basis of freedom unparalleled in the rest of the world.
Stephanopoulos: I agree with that…
Bachmann: That’s what people want...they realize our government is taking away our freedom.

Stephanopoulos: But that’s not what you said. You said that the Founding Fathers worked tirelessly to end slavery.

Bachmann: Well if you look at one of our Founding Fathers, John Quincy Adams, that’s absolutely true. He was a very young boy when he was with his father serving essentially as his father’s secretary. He tirelessly worked throughout his life to make sure that we did in fact one day eradicate slavery...

Stephanopoulos: He wasn’t one of the Founding Fathers – he was a president, he was a Secretary of State, he was a member of Congress, you’re right he did work to end slavery decades later. But so you are standing by this comment that the Founding Fathers worked tirelessly to end slavery?

Bachmann: Well, John Quincy Adams most certainly was a part of the Revolutionary War era. He was a young boy but he was actively involved.

A founding father that was a young boy?! He was 9 years old. Let's throw Superman into this too, since he can fly and reverse time. Of course Jeebus is a founding father, he did create the earth in order to give birth to himself and then save the earth all over again 2,000 years later. How much further can we lower the bar? I mean how can she expect to be taken seriously as a Presidential contender and she doesn't know John Q. Adams was the 6th President and hardly a founding father. We learned this stuff in middle school, typically with a song or some rhyme to remember all the President's of the US. This is laughable, but it's also sad, because she believes, truly believes that Obama with all of his flaws is afraid of her based on her intellectual abilities. She thinks that he some how is afraid of a debate on the issues and is a serious substantive competitor. In her world, Obama and his team will do whatever they can do diminish her because of their intense fear of her. This from the person that leads the tea party, who believes that the Revolutionary War began in New Hampshire and not Massachusetts (Boston TEA PARTY). This is like Manny Paqiano fighting an emaciated child, no competition. Maybe she is just faking it till she makes it. My shih-tzu wouldn't be afraid to debate Michelle Bachmann. I would feel totally comfortable going out for 3 nights straight with Amy Winehouse, drinking Four Loko, smoking crack, smearing myself with peanut butter and having orgies with random want to be rappers named Tron and debate Michelle Bachmann and I'm confident I could win. Her Congressional district should be embarrassed every time she opens her mouth after they finish laughing at every idiotic thing that comes out of that gaping hole that never closes. It seems that Intelligent Design and Flake History are taught at the same school and Bachmann and Palin along with the majority of the Republican field hold master's degree's.

If this rodeo clown is an example of the quality of presidenti­al political candidates in the US, Americans will soon again become the laughing stock of the world when her vacuous rhetoric, ignorance of American history and inability to be responsive to a question becomes more apparent. First she is channeling a gay serial killing clown now this... What is happening down there girls? Are Bachman and Palin drinking from the same suspect water supply? Are there bimbo republican pills?

It would only be worse if Bachmann were black...

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Michelle Bachmann for President? Send in the Clowns...

Today my comedy prayer's have been answered with rodeo clown / category 5 moron Michelle Bachmann announcing her bid for President of the United States of America. Making a speech in Waterloo Iowa, she stated that "Well, what I want them to know is just like, John Wayne was from Waterloo, Iowa. That's the kind of spirit that I have, too." Well genius, the movie star, John Wayne was mainly a fictional character, since it's not like you actually knew him. Also the America that he roamed around in shooting random people in, never really existed, like the things you say. So I guess there is something you and "John Wayne" have in common. John Wayne was the good guy in westerns and it only existed in a child's imagination­n when they got their spankin' new cowboy and cowgirl outfits at Christmas and imagined shooting those "savage Indians" while romanticiz­ing the white bank robbers, the lawless, and the "hero" sheriff that could tame it all. Hopefully, most of those children grew up. Well, they are running for President now and setting policy... John was as real as your knowledge and understanding of history, plus, he was from Winterset, Iowa. John Wayne Gacy, the serial killer was from Waterloo Iowa, now if she is arguing that she is dangerous and has the spirit of a soulless, sociopath, I wholeheartedly agree. Even though, I am insulting John Wayne Gacey's intelligence with the comparison, and for that I humbly apologize. Michelle boasts that she isn't a flake, was a tax attorney, served in political office and was a foster mother of 23. (As if that means something).

Here are some of Michelle's greatest hits:

"Our ancestors had different cultures, different backgrounds, different traditions. How unique in all of the world, that one nation that was the resting point from people groups all across the world," Except for that slavery thing or Women's sufferage for that matter. What about Japanese internment camps? This nation fought 2 wars protesting what she just described as this country's greatest strength and ultimate failure.

"It didn't matter the color of their skin, it didn't matter their language, it didn't matter their economic status."  Why yes it is. Considering that's not what happened at all. I wonder did the Japanese feel so special when they were placed in internment camps during WWII, or the Chinese when they were strung out on opium so we could force them to build the railroads. Oh, and I am sure the Irish and the Italians and now the Mexicans feel the love from this so called mythological melting pot in this fantasy world of hers. Even white men had property restrictions in order to vote until the mid 1800's. The US Constitution had slavery written into it, but according to our Rhodes scholar that's channeling our favorite serial killer, The founding father's worked tirelessly to end slavery. She even mentioned names like John Quincy Adams, our 2nd VP who tried to end slavery...*sigh*, apparently she got her history lesson from watching Amistad and Gone with the Wind and slamming Jack and Coke or snorting coke. Who knows. Maybe the demon that has sucked the brain from Palin is now possessing Bachmann. He must be working double duty now. The Emancipation Proclamation ended slavery in 1865, respectively. The Declaration of Independence was written when? 1776...So, the founding fathers either were vampires in the newest incarnation of Twilight or they kicked the can down the road. The founding of the country was built on the blood of the Native Americans whose land was stolen from the European settlers, i.e. the Conquistadors, Lewis and Clarke Expedition, the Quakers, the Colonials,etc... but then again, let's forget them too. That entire time period was full of romance and wonder where scalping's, raping, lynchings, and genocides bring a deserved sense of superiority of our culture. Right? I mean, were you home schooled? There are people in the inner city or the back swamp who have a better grasp on American history than her, but they don't pass laws. They aren't lawmakers in the US Senate and they aren't running for the highest office in the country. This is what happens when a candidate depends on Wikipedia for it's research reference materials.

" Our children... are the prize for this community, they are specifically targeting our children." Her belief that the gays were targeting straight children.

"And what a bizarre time we're in, when a judge will say to little children that you can't say the pledge of allegiance, but you must learn that homosexuality is normal and you should try it.'' So, we can go to a judge and have him tell us that being "a gay" is ok and try it when we go to court to pay a speeding ticket? What planet is she on? I have worked in the criminal justice system for over 5 years and I have never heard that type of exchange being offered and I don't think that anyone who isn't high or seriously mentally ill has had any conversation remotely similar to this one.

"It is horrific to know that in the African American community, 50 percent of all African American pregnancies in the United States end in abortion, 50 percent. That is a genocide of African Americans of the United States. It should not be. There are Americans all across this country who would love to adopt African American babies, but they can't because 50 percent of all African American pregnancies today are ending in abortion.'' It's so kind of Michelle to care about the black babies in America and her mythological fuzzy math she's come up with. Here on planet reality, we know that her quote is 100% nonsense and foolish and the reason that Hollywood actresses run to AFRICA to adopt these endangered blacks because they can't adopt African American blacks. Yes, I see the logic in Bachmann world. 

''Unfortunately, the Census data has become very intricate, very personal, a lot of the questions that are asked. I know for my family, the only question we will be answering is how many people are in our home. We won't be answering any information beyond that, because the Constitution doesn't require any information beyond that.'' Yes, 10 questions are so intricate and deep. So intricate in fact that 50 Cent has made a song called 20 questions about nothing in particular. Does the US Constitution actually have to address the Census for this tit mouse to actually take it seriously? When did name, address, age, etc...become sinister? Didn't they have a census in the Bible and that's what she states on her Jesus-palooza tour? But now it's a grand conspiracy because the constitution doesn't have a provision or an ammendment regarding a census.

''Does that mean that someone's 13-year-old daughter could walk into a sex clinic, have a pregnancy test done, be taken away to the local Planned Parenthood abortion clinic, have their abortion, be back and go home on the school bus? That night, mom and dad are never the wiser.'' A sex clinic? Does that mean a place where people go to have sex, learn how to have sex, or what? Maybe they can just watch the 2008 Republican National Convention and watch Bristol Palin or read her ghost written book. How about they take a tour bus ride through an "abstinence only" school, that's a sex clinic. Any idiot knows that having an abortion isn't like a trip to Disney Land. One can't simply just have it and then hop on the bus in time for meatloaf, especially if you are a minor. However, in her case, late term abortions should be celebrated to protect the human race from her level of rank stupidity.

 ''[Pelosi] is committed to her global warming fanaticism to the point where she has said she has even said she is trying to save the planet. We all know that someone did that 2,000 years ago.'' So Jesus came to save our souls by dying on the cross, but in psycho world, he also was a conservationist and died to save the planet. Wow! I guess Michael Jackson wasted time and energy wrting Earth Song. Every climate change scientist is wrong and apparently reading and producing the same faulty data. Somebody quick stop this travesty, Bachmann knows the truth and she can save us from this faulty science. She must have gotten her knowledge of theology from the Passion of the Christ, because what she is saying is not in any Bible that I have ever read. But, according to her, parts of the artic don't need to be protected because no one can lay eyes on them.

This woman is not only stupid, but dangerous. People trust her because she plays that Christian card so effectively and they ignore her glaring racist, idiotic, yet laughable statements. Bachmann represents the return to MacCarthyism, anti-intelluctualism and a nation in decline.

If an pond algae or any inanimate object was running for president against this woman, the pond algae would have my vote.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Michael Jackson- 2 Years after the Music Died

You And Your Friends Were Laughing At Me In Town, But it's Okay, And It's Okay,You Wont Be Laughing. Girl When I'm Not Around, I'll Be Okay------Give In To Me-------Michael Jackson

Today marks the second anniversary of Michael Jackson's death and the death of music at large. (and Farrah Fawcets, sorry you died on the wrong day).  Remember when Kanye said "I'mma let you finish, Beyonce's video was one of the greatest video's of all time!" ? I can't quite duplicate the aura of sweat, desperation, douchebaggery, drunkenness and venereal disease to describe the picture adequately. However, I thought to myself..."Beyonce, leotard, dancing with 2 other girls in a glove she swagger jacked from Kylie Minogue. How is that different from any other video and how does this qualify as the greatest video of all time?" I swear that song was written by a retarded person. It's funny the male bashing going on in that song by a person paid to take off her clothes while married to a camel, one has to question her morals. Most videos that MJ did were mini movies with story lines that were more than a chick shaking a cellulite thigh, slanging weave in a wind tunnel repeating one line over and over. Single ladies was a glorified strip tease, Michael Jackson created art.

Michael's music touched the lives of every generation that was fortunate to have been born for the last 100 years. (If you don't understand that, think about it and you'll get it.) Older people will remember and cherish him as Little Michael from the Jackson Five, with his cute little Afro, bell bottoms, belting out "I'll be there" and "ABC". He was cute...They will remember how sensitive and shy he was but he was a little dynamo on the stage and he put seasoned adult performers to shame. My generation remembers him at the height of his fame, the 80's. There was no one bigger or cooler to us than Michael Jackson. (we were little) Everything he did or wore, we all wanted to copy from the sequined glove, the leather jackets, even the Jeri curl. We tried in vain to moonwalk, learned the thriller dance and even looked past him carrying around a fully dressed Bubbles to award ceremonies and amusement parks.

The one thing each generation had in common, is that we all took Michael for granted. We always assumed he would be there to make music or for us to use his eccentricities as comedic fodder. He left in the void an absolute wreck called the "music industry".  You may not understand what I mean when I say music is dead, because you can hear music everywhere you go, or hear musicians perform for large audiences. But what you are hearing coming out of your ear-buds and amplifiers is not music, it is the badly reanimated corpse of a once thriving and evolving monster, now extinct as the dodo, cloned and recycled into a consumer commodity. There are no new genres, no new instruments, no new sounds to sample, and the new pop stars are not producing new or groundbreaking music. It's all been done and said before and the only way these so called musicians can be "innovative" is to wear crazy clothes, be more provocative, take off more clothes, be more controversial, or perform some publicity stunt unrelated to the music. (Rihanna, Gaga, Chris Brown, J.Lo, P. Diddy, every rapper). They have told every story, told every emotion, whatever lesson you want, any philosophy rational or irrational, there's an app for that.

Even though music is dead, musicians will insist on dragging the dead corpse around for who knows what reason. They will continue to market sh*t and call it sugar and expect us to pay $.99 per song for it. Many people will attempt to use the term "star", "icon", "superstar", but none truly know the dedication showmanship and dedication inherent in those words. These so called "celebrities" and "pop stars" effect on the music industry can only be compared to the US atom bomb on Hiroshima. Yes...that destructive to music. It's a primordial soup of non-talent. There are no signs of life, not one.

We miss you Michael and I would trade any of these whores, street trash, goats, non rappers, and fraudsters that can't write, sing, dance, or compose one line without auto-tune for 1 original song.

Friday, June 24, 2011

Rihanna The Talentless Goat That Just Won't Go Away

The definition of Rihanna: Proof that the music industry is no longer a raw, gifted talent extruder. More like a money sucking, take-a-quasi-supermodel chick-between-the-ages of 12-21-sex her up-record her horrible voice-and-use state-of-the-art equipment to alter her voice into sounding like pre-21st century Whitney Houston-Shoot a video of her masturbating-and-force youth to buy the album through a brainwashing promotion-mechanism.

An example of pure modern street trash intoxicating the population's minds.

Rihanna is a singer whose songs are cheap, tacky, and meaningless. She sings about anything from umbrellas to murderers...

Her most popular audiences include brain dead teens who think it's cool to hang around McDonald's threatening people with umbrellas.

It is also questioned whether Rihanna suffers from a permanent and severe condition of blocked nose. It can be heard very clearly in 'Unfaithful'

She thinks her audience is either deaf or stupid as she tends to repeat a sentence around 50 times in each song (ella-ella-ella-ella. YES we get it, thanks.) But perhaps this could be due to her lack of imagination and/or incompetence of coming up with new lyrics. (she doesn't write her songs).

This is my excuse for a dance routine
  Like a scorching case of herpes...I think we all knew this was was inevitable. Some news today came to my attention that I just couldn't let slide...this tool, this crotch monkey is re releasing her latest album Loud. This assault on the ears everywhere will be reloaded like her GGGB album. So we will have more stiff crotch shots, gyrations, 12 different key singing, and other unholy sounds emanating from that thing people called a voice. Yes, the voice of our generation. She always looks constipated, she sounds whiny, nasally and robotic on her best days. On every other day she goes between a goat being impaled with a hot metal poker or a dying cat dipped in hot wax. Everyone is tortured. She's a scourge of the music industry, a greek tragedy and a sonically engineered puppet.

Do you find me sexy? I SAID DO YOU FIND ME SEXY?!
Someone tell me why does it take 50 people on her team to write an album? That's right, 50 and the best they can come up with is "oh nah nah, what's my name". Of course those people are probably sound engineers to fix the goat/cat voice, they have to turn those nobs and dials and Auto-tune her to the point where all emotion is erased. If people like her because she is pretty, then she should model, period. Singing and dancing is not her forte and anyone who has ever seen a live performance knows what I'm talking about. It's the laziest thing that I have ever seen, she is wrong to charge people for tickets to see a dominatrix/ softcore porn/ karoke show being lipsyched to badly. It's a recession! Have you seen an artist slay her own song? Rihanna does and does it exceedingly well. It's like she is speaking in tongues and it's all baby gibberish. Her dancing, well, that's fingering herself, walking, sitting, humping a tank, sticking her butt out, squatting like she is going to drop a deuce, rinse and repeat. I don't think she has ever broken a sweat performing, unless she is grinding on a mic stand or expected to actually sing live without backing vocals. Then the charade is over. Her label has done a great job for the last 5 years of  turning water into wine and attempting to convince us that her warbling /whining is singing, but what they haven't done is given our little smuttress a no.1 album. This reloaded monstrosity will make her 7th, and it will still not be a no.1 album. Yes, this little fraud, is a singles "artist", no one buys her albums because everyone knows she sucks (things other than Jay-Z's member). That's why she is "reloading" this stupid album until she has time to find someone to swagger jack and then "change her style" so she can remain "unique". It's amazing that out of a 10 song CD, she released 5 singles and on Itunes, Love the Way You Lie, the song where she sang in 11 keys, that was an album only song and she still didn't reach platinum status for about 6 months. Read the reviews...Nicki Minaj went platinum before Rihanna and believe me, neither should have. Every album she releases will come with a re-mix album because she can't come up with new material. How hard is it when you don't write your own material and you just repeat the same line over and over?

Let's talk about her so called style. She has swagger jacked sooooooo many more talented artists to achieve this so called "bad girl" image. I call it, little whore playing dress up. Let's start from the beginning. When she came out with that annoying, robotic "Pon de Replay" song she was Rihoynce or Rihcycle, a little Beyonce clone. Long weave, same style makeup, even wearing similar dresses and outfits. Now, the vocals and dancing skills is another subject. She did copy choreography from some of Beyonce's videos, but again that's another topic for another day. Another artist on the label was Fe Fe Dobson, she had a certain eclectic style that Rihanna stole in the early days as well, except Fe Fe could actually sing, but she wasn't as cute as Rihanna or not as willing to work the stroll as Rihanna. As usual, Rihanna releases annoying single after annoying single, "Don't stop the music", which ironically she hasn't actually produced any actual music, and that dreadful ballad "Unfaithful" where she whined off key for the entire song and she should've been charged for commission of mass suicides or murder for those vocals. Next, she began her GGGB routine and bam! She copped Victoria Beckham's hair. Oh...but it was just a tad bit late, a few years late to be exact. She of course started wearing hats to cover up that chrome dome, but it was still Posh's bob. Then the bob kept getting shorter, and then she started dressing like Grace Jones and Pink. Ex squeeze me? Original hun tea? No ma'am. She still wasn't insufferable yet, so...

DUH DUH DUH! THE BEAT DOWN HEARD ROUND THE WORLD! Rihanna emerged empowered and in a blond recylced KELIS hairstyle. Yes, that shaved head nonsense, Kelis rocked first when she married Nas. But, then Rihanna became "hard", wearing bondage gear a la Madonna from Justify my Love minus the dancing skills, then, she became a rock star. Also, more Gaga and Beyonce ripoffs emerged, like in her hard video. Remember the helmet that looked like Mickey Mouse ears? That came from Gaga's Paparazzi. Of course she did what she does best, laying down sticking out her fanny and rolling around. She let the world know that she attacked Chris first, but that was ignored and everyone rallied around her so called struggle even as her painfully off key album Rated R flopped. Yeah, by the way she swagger jacked M.I.A on Rude Boy...It's shameful that Chris didn't beat some talent into this joke of an "entertainer".

Fast forward to Loud, Rihanna has decided that the only way to sell albums is release continual coverage of her boobs, vajajay, and nonstop retelling of her "incident" with her best Side Show Bob/ weak Janet Jackson Velvet Rope impression while her thighs get thicker and thicker. Since she isn't dancing there is no need for her to have a toned look for her legs. Rihanna is the queen of posing while people dance around her. She will just keep talking about penis photos, going into sex shops, having sex, and Chris Brown's beat down anytime she does any appearance or magazine cover, while her accent comes and goes worse than Ms. Cleo. She has also been jacking Madonna, circa 1985 with the corsets and big bows in her hair, "Like a Virgin" to be more precise. Madonna wasn't really dancing then, just twirling around, so that's right up Rih Rih's alley, among other things. She never hesitates to take a ques. about Chris as long as it's around single time or magazine time, or she has some false controversy to stir to try and bump up her singles numbers.

This Muppet has no personality what so ever, it's a complete flatline. Take Madonna with all of her style re inventions, her personality remained the same, no matter what she wore, what color her hair was, she was Madonna. Same for Cher. Rihanna is a blank slate, she has the same empty look on her face no matter who she jacks and the voice is still godawful. Every album she changes her look why? She has no identity. She is just a tool and a puppet of her label. It's all a smokescreen to divert attention away from the ghastly sounds coming from her throat. If her handlers and stylists didn't show up she would be totally lost. All she can work is the pipe and it seems she's not handling that to well. How much sex can you sing about and how badly? No progression, no depth in 7 so called albums. That man down controversy didn't even get her to pass #40 on billboard and her stupid tour isn't selling out in the US, just like her last tour. If she didn't release an album of nursery rhymes every 6 months, no one would remember her or miss her and she knows it. She has no personality, she is 1 dimensional and I am being kind with that. You can almost see the cartoon characters chasing each other in her brain when she gives interviews. Beyonce' is stupid, but next to Rihanna, she's a Rhodes Scholar. She even had the audacity to write a book! No one knows what happened with that, but since no one has mentioned it, it couldn't have done have well since she is one of the biggest media whores in the business. She should still be picking corn in a field in Barbados, I hope she saves her money, actually I hope she goes broke and the Republicans deport her trashy tail, but since we have seen everything, what would be the point?  Jay-Z owes the world an apology for assassinating the eardrums and sanity of all those subjected to the wretched sounds they have produced from the studio.

I don't know what the eff this is about
Rihanna stated that Rated -R was so deep that she broke out in tears when she listened to it, let's see if the magic will touch you:

Come here rude boy, boy; is you big enough?
Take it, take it baby, baby
Take it, take it; love me, love me
Do you like it?

Boy, I want, want, want whatchu want, want, want
Give it to me, baby like boom, boom, boom
What I want, want, want is what you want, want, want
Nah nah-ah

That was so deep and profound. That makes Human Nature seem like a Rihanna song by comparison. Strive to be No.1 Rih Rih! Oh, you have been, haven't you? Is the magic touching you? It's touching me... or my gag reflex. I broke out into tears too, hearing her sing. That was literally 15 random words strung together about nothing. Deep as 2 monkey's in a zoo chasing it's tail banging a pot, but that would sound more pleasurable than Rihanna live. They at least move with purpose and are way more entertaining, unlike the mic stand humper/ stripper who murders her own songs. Her idea of a performance is a bathing suit with fringe and I'm supposed to be excited...

Every time I hear that "voice", I die a little more inside and I wonder if god really exists and why he would allow this amount of suffering to happen worldwide. She did a song for Haiti and that voice more than likely caused the earthquake in Japan. No one should let Rihanna do any relief concerts for fear of National Disasters. Every live performance is a National Tragedy and should be labeled a terrorist act. Everytime Rihanna goes on stage, gives an interview, poses for a magazine or *snicker* acts, the terrorist threat level should go up to red automatically.

I'm a Model, but I tricked You Hoes
Rihanna is a low class talentless hack/ Bratz doll prototype who probably gave Jay-Z the best head of his life in order to get her record deal.  5 to 7 head in fact. YouTube her murdering Mariah's Hero and then ask how she got her record deal. It wasn't on the strength of her vocal talent or her corpulent stage presence. She can't sing, she can't dance, she can barely pose, she's a tranny  version of Cassie. You know that face got some masculine angles... At least Cassie knows she is Puffy's jump off, Rihanna actually believes she is a diva. She really believes she can "sing", and so does her delusional fans. All of these people feed into the lie that Rihanna has talent and she laughs all the way to the bank. We all need to chip in for a vocal transplant for this 5 headed goat and send help with her sex obsessed middle school lyrics.

Rihanna can give us all hope, none of us can have musical talent, but if this stiff stripper goat made it, then dammit if she can make it, so can I.

Rick Perry- The New George W Bush Only Smarter?

Republican flavor of the month Rick Perry may answer my prayers and get in the race for President and I pray that he does. For those who don't know who this gem is, let me refresh your memories. He wears cowboy boots with suits, jogs with a gun, and when Obama won was so angry threatened to secede from the union. Now, he wants to run for president, but not really comprehending the "United States" concept. Oh..his boots say, "come and take it", which are making people question his hetero status, for obvious reasons.

 Rick Perry announced that he rented out a 70,000 seat football stadium in Houston, for something called the response, which sounds like a home pregnancy test, but actually is to quote the governor “a Christian prayer service to provide spiritual solutions to the many challenges we face as a nation.” I guess the idea is to get together in a big group and pray all at once. That way the signal is stronger and god doesn't lose you when he's going through a canyon. But here on planet reality, may I point out that there is no such thing as spiritual solutions to national problems. If that's where we are as a country, if our official government policy is “yee haw... Jesus take the wheel!” then we're dead already.

On Perry's Jesus exploitation site, Perry writes, "there is hope for America. "It lies in heaven and we will find it on our knees." (I'm pretty sure many a hooker and pimp has uttered those words.) He also says "some problems are beyond our power to solve." Really?! What happened to American Exceptionalism? What happened to "pulling ourselves up by our bootstraps?" What happened to being the greatest nation on earth? The "only superpower"? And if Perry thinks only god can solve our problems, why is he even in government? Isn't he in the wrong line of work? Well...pimping out people in the name of the lord does count as politics and preaching, so it does go both ways. Why doesn't he just stay at home and light a bunch of candles like Sissy Spacek's mom in Carrie?

Here's a novel approach: Not only are our problems NOT beyond our power to solve, they're actually fairly easy to solve. You have a giant budget deficit, like Perry has in Texas, raise taxes. Everyone that hasn't been in a coma know that taxes have been at the lowest rate since the 1950's. That coupled with 2 wars, a recession, are the reasons that we have a huge deficit. Not because God was angry that Lady Gaga wore penis shoes on American Idol even though J.Lo's voice could start the Apocalypse at any given time.

Sometimes it doesn't require prayer to solve solutions, sometimes it only takes a calculator.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Herman Cain Plays Race Card...How Pathetic...

Republican Presidential Nominee/ House Negro Herman Cain is now alleging that Jon Stewart is mocking him because he's a "black conservative". No.... He mocked you because you are a stupid man with stupid ideas running for President. We don't need a black version of George W. Bush, at least the say stupid things version, Obama is the policy version. Wait...I thought he doesn't use labels. Isn't calling yourself black and conservative 2 LABELS? "I am an American. Black. Conservative," he said. "I don’t use African American, because I’m American, I’m black and I’m conservative. I don’t like people trying to label me. African American is socially acceptable for some people, but I am not some people." Let's count the number of labels he used here. American, check. Black, check. Conservative, check. So that's 3 LABELS. For the love of we have a negro with an inferiority complex that still has the cotton underneath his fingernails and he still made crappy pizza. If anyone knows where a Godfather's Pizza is please let me know...

If he takes issue with the term "African American", that's fine, surely he realizes that's the PC way that "non blacks" describe blacks without sounding like ignorant back water racists. But Jon Stewart made fun of him for being a moron, not for being black. Not signing bills longer than 3 pages, deserves scorn and ridicule no matter the race of the idiot that made that statement. If he believes that only signing 3 page bills are rational and probable, double down on that ridiculous premise and continue to be the minstrel that he is. It's a bit early to whip out the race card and with a comedian no less, considering Jon Stewart makes fun of everyone, Keith Olberman, Michael Steele, Michelle Bachmann, Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity, President Obama, the list goes on and on...where is he singling out blacks? That sounds like an equal opportunity offender to me.

Maybe because the nonsense that Herman Cain says is so foolish and gut wrenching funny that he is technically a comedian and not a politician that only other black comedians can touch his material. Maybe Cain should go back to elementary school and imply the "think before you speak" rule, and maybe he wouldn't get laughed at. Playing the race card while requiring members of your cabinet to take oaths of loyalty to prove allegiance to Christianity?! Seriously? The big joke here is that he is a black conservative that can win the GOP nomination and can win. The joke is definitely on him and we are all in on it.

Deep in the dungeons of the Republican war room or the Death Star, GOP operatives  have decided to share the same brain and utilize their latest ploy :   to attack Jon Stewart this election cycle, as if that will take some of his actual credibility or wind from his sails. Guys listen: HE'S A COMEDIAN! WE TRUST HIM OVER YOU! He is NOT a real political pundit. If any of you told us the sky were blue, I would need to have it fact checked. All you guys are doing is driving up his ratings. You guys are boring, it's tax cuts, no abortions ever, I love Jesus, kill immigrants, kill terrorists, defund everything democrats like and Reagan was the patron saint that died for America's sins. Republican­s have portrayed the president as a witch doctor, put out a picture of a white house full of watermelon­s and worse. He would be more than justified at calling out racism many times but chose quiet dignity instead. (unwisely at times). Cain was parodied once and he's already raising hell, and he frankly needs to man up.  This a directive from the collective republican­ brain (if there is such a thing) to take Stewart down a notch because he just makes too much sense when he makes fun of their shameless behavior, and the Masterpiece Theatre we call a political system.

Mr. Cain, he mocks you because you are hilarious. An African American, wild-eyed, right-wing radical is hilarious on the face of it. We mock because we love the sheer idiocy of it. Yes we are laughing at you.

Keep it up!

Lindsay Lohan Benefits from White Privilege

Trout pout trash tartlet / Fire Crotch Lindsanity has failed yet ANOTHER round of sobriety tests while being confined on house arrest and she is expected to sashay into court tomorrow and provide some lame excuse about how she is working and respects the criminal justice system, while consistently throwing a middle finger at it at every turn. She recently filmed a commercial for from her home, and the L.A. County Probation Department will request that she be sent back to jail; she was assigned to wear an ankle bracelet in her home for 35 days, the end result of a four month sentence she received for violating the terms of her probation following a 2007 stint in jail, which she did by stealing a necklace from a Los Angeles jewelry store.

Let's put this in perspective:

The woman achieved 2 DUIs in a single month, committed assault, and theft, yet her time in jail pales in comparison to what us regular people would face in the same situation. She's not getting put away anytime soon. Unless her name was Laquetha or Tyquerius. Our justice system works best when motivated by the values of prevention, redemption and equality: protecting the public from unlawful and dangerous behavior, helping troubled people to reclaim their lives and ensuring that the law is applied fairly and evenhandedly.

The United States leads the world in incarceration, but fails badly in rehabilitation. According to the Sentencing Project , over 2.1 million people are locked up in America’s prisons and jails—a 500 percent increase over the past thirty years. The number of Americans incarcerated for drug offences in 1980, 40,000, has skyrocketed to a half-million today. Although Blacks and whites use illegal substances at about the same rates, Blacks are far more likely to be incarcerated for drug offenses. Between 1990 and 2000 the number of African Americans incarcerated in state prisons for drug offenses increased by over 80 percent to 145,000, a number that is 2.5 times higher than that for whites. Affluent whites like LaLoca are far more likely to be let go with a warning, to avoid prison time, or to avoid criminal scrutiny at all. Their substance abuse problems lead them to places like Promises, NOT the jailhouse. Race and class, then, play a powerful role in determining the consequences of unlawful behavior.

For the racists that claim erroneously that blacks commit the most crimes, IT IS A SENTENCING DISPARITY BASED ON SOCIO ECONOMIC FACTORS.

Why don't the courts just convert a receipt book into a book of free passes and be done with it? Then, every time she screws up, she could just tear out a free pass and hand it to the judge, smile and say "sorry, here's a copy of one my movies from back when I was cute". So much simpler that way and for the tea people, it's cheaper on the tax payers. That's a win, win.

 At this point the criminal justice system, the judges, the lawyers, the prosecutors are her enablers. This is a person who looks up to and idolizes Marilyn Monroe and if the courts, her family and Lindsay herself don't get real about her addictive personality, she will end up in a semen soaked death alone in a pool, just like her idol.

According to Lindsay she has not consumed any alcohol and I believe that she believes she has not taken a drink even though it is evident. I think Lindsay's brain has essentiall­y been rewired by her years of alcohol and drug abuse to the point that she is not even aware that she was consuming alcohol, this is not the first time Lindsay gotten buzzed by her anklet. I think adding to her self abuse, narcissism and entitlemen­t is that she still gets movie roles, commercials, fashion shoots, a revolving door in the legal system and a still growing (mostly brain dead)  fan base. She is without consequenc­es in society but not with her body, that is what she has to watch for. (She looks 45). She is the drunk Uncle or Aunt that everyone is afraid will show up to the Christmas party or Wedding that will admit that they had a 15 hooker gang bang and paid with a bounced check and couldn't pay their college tuition. The person that goes to the strip club on a Tuesday afternoon to eat lunch and vomits more than they drink and slurs "I love everybody!" She has a dealer on speed dial,  knows one in every city and carries a flask.

Lindsanity needs to go to the jailhouse and not another posh rehab where the power of  her tarnished "celebrity" can get her hangers on and leeches from the staff that is supposed to help her, yet don't. She needs to detox, really detox in a 12x9 cell, let her have a cell mate and have her go for what she knows. Then put her in inpatient treatment, a hospital, not Promises or some vacation like club med place, but a place with padded cells and doctors on state pay roll. She should be court ordered for treatment for no less than 6 months and no contact with her parents, assistants, agents, or other handlers. This Dr. Drew Celebrity Rehab Crap is some nonsense and it's a play on exploiting people's misery. That's the Hollywood beast isn't it? They build these people up, especially child stars, control and manage every aspect of their lives except how to become a functional human being. Then, when they are no longer bankable they discard them and we revel in their misery and wait until they self destruct. 

So before we start killing "urban thugs" in the streets, maybe we need to admit that there is racial disparity in sentencing based on socio economic factors and not a pre disposition by a particular race to commit crime.

The criminal justice system see's the color GREEN!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Neal Boortz- A Racist or A Moron?

"You know what? I, for one, am tired of putting up with this crap. And you want to know why I moved out of Atlanta and only spend a couple of weeks a year in this town? That's one of the reasons. Carjackings, violence, people getting shot. It's ridiculous. This city harbors an urban culture of violence. And I want you to look around. You drive into the city. The railroad overpass is on the downtown connector covered with graffiti. And that-- That is just an advertisement for everybody coming into this town that we really don't give a damn about those who would screw up our quality of life around here. We really just don't care. We don't care enough to paint over graffiti on the overpasses that come into our city, advertising welcome to Atlanta, here's some of our finest graffiti, from some of our finest urban thugs and their little gang signs. And pick up the paper tomorrow morning. Read about all the carjackings. Read about the innocent people shot for the pure de-hell of it."

"This town is starting to look like a garbage heap. And we got too damn many urban thugs, yo, ruining the quality of life for everybody. And I'll tell you what it's gonna take. You people, you are - you need to have a gun. You need to have training. You need to know how to use that gun. You need to get a permit to carry that gun. And you do in fact need to carry that gun and we need to see some dead thugs littering the landscape in Atlanta. We need to see the next guy that tries to carjack you shot dead right where he stands. We need more dead thugs in this city. And let their -- let their mommas -- let their mommas say, "He was a good boy. He just fell in with the good crowd." And then lock her ass up."

Behold, the next Grand Wizard of the KKK. Did he just advocate killing "urban thugs" in the streets of Atlanta? Does he mean Black people, White people, Hispanic people? Maybe the Skin heads and other pieces of trash hate groups can be considered so called "thugs". I'm so glad he's on the side of us law abiding folks and thinks we should run the streets just shooting people. Get up from behind the desk and let the little boys go. Why doesn't he just scream "nigger" on the radio and get it over with, that would be more subtle than advocating for killing thugs and hoping they litter the landscape of Atlanta. This man is so charming and so eloquent that he can charm the pants off of Charlie Sheen and the goddesses. Does he think this is a Western or The Matrix where people have high speed chases on the Freeway and where people run on the wall and every one's hair and makeup is still perfect? Where is the FBI on this? If a black rapper said this, how quick would we have Congressional hearings about violent content? This is a prime example of: "guns don't kill people, stupid people with guns kill people." I think that Boortz is not only stupid but suffering from a severe mental illness and that should disqualify him from carrying a firearm, or procreating for that matter. Isn't this something that a thug would say? A stupid thug, but a thug nonetheless.

Someone needs to take this old, bald, pasty white asshat out, hand him a gun and tell him to go off some urban thugs. You don't get to take your bodyguards, you can't stay locked in your gated community with the guards at the gate and the security alarms everywhere and wait for them to come to you, you just have hit the streets, all alone with your gun.

Here is some of our American hero's greatest hits:

"Letting welfare recipients vote is like letting the inmates run the asylum." Right...we should also have IQ tests for elected officials, if we have to use this litmus test. No one could ever vote or hold public office ever.

"There are four levels of homicide: negligent, criminal, justified and praiseworthy." I went to law school, but I never heard of "praiseworthy" homicide in any legal precedent and I read Rehnquist, Thomas and Scalia's uber conservative opinions. This from the God Party that can justify murder and sanction it under the cross.

"Prostitutes shouldn't go to jail. Unless they're just whoreable." Nothing needs to be said, this is completely undefendable without slamming ectasy or some other GOP drug of choice.

"Religion is, all too often, a refuge for scoundrels." Here is the one thing we agree on and Boortz is a King among Scoundrels. What's interesting is that the religious right wing listen to his show, the very people that he is mocking in that quote. Shameful and transparent, at least to those of us that pay attention.

"It's a shame that stupidity isn't painful." It is, very painful to people that aren't stupid. Listening to you, Rush, Hannity, Beck, Palin, Bachmann, and every televangelist and right wing panhandler is like someone shooting off firecracker's off in my head. Then, an alien descends and sucks out what's left with a metallic straw. Maybe that's just his sphincter that makes the sucking noise.

Take out some thugs, Neil. Go ahead. Show us how tough the gunslingin' righties really are.

Louis Farrakhan and Blatant Intellectual Dishonesty

"I can never apologize for telling the truth... I can apologize for the manner of telling the truth." - Louis Farrakhan

You have criticized America's involvement in Libya, Afghanistan and Iraq and blasted Obama as being an "assassin and a murderer". "We voted for our brother Barack, a beautiful human being with a sweet heart,” Farrakhan said, in a video making the rounds on the Internet. But he has turned into someone else, Farrakhan told the crowd. “Now he's an assassin.” America “puts her trust in her weapons of war,” he continued. “She threatens the nations of the earth and has my brother calling for the assassination of brother Muammar Qaddafi. What has he done? I can defend that man. You don't know that man.”“My poor brother. They said they were only going over there for humanitarian reasons -- and we believed that. You've been deceived.” Farrakhan draws a comparison between U.S. intervention in Libya and the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan."You talk about a man killing his own people,” Farrakhan told the crowd. “When you lie to the American people saying that Saddam Hussein had weapons of mass destruction. When you lie and then take innocent young men who come to serve their country, and send them to die in Iraq, in Afghanistan, over lies, that's a murderer in the White House."

Obama is no saint, by any means, but I think you are sorely lacking on facts and reality . George W Bush made the case for weapons of mass destruction as a justification for an Iraqi invasion, not Obama. Bush started a war under false pretenses by forcing the intelligence community to "get him the requisite information" is a far cry from what you are stating. Obama wasn't even elected as US Senator of Illinois until 2004 and the US invasion didn't even begin until 2002. That's a full 2 years AFTER the Iraqi invasion began. The conflict in Afghanistan began admirably enough, to catch and kill Bin Laden and kill or disable AL- Qaida, now 10 yrs. later, the cost has grown greater than what the American people feel obligated or want to pay. This vase that we broke in the peverbial pottery barn 10 years ago, we can't keep fixing, especially if that store isn't willing to clean up the mess on their own floor. The comparison between Bush and Obama is not only intellectually dishonest but ludicrous yet not surprising from someone dressed like a reject from a Sin bad movie. You always take the short cut with your so called intellectual conclusions and when someone doesn't agree, they are shouted down or ridiculed as being contaminated by Jews. How you can praise Obama in 2008, even after Obama wisely denounced you, now he is an "assassin". Maybe you can defend Qaddafi, because he gave you money, $10 million over the last 5 years, in fact. If Qaddafi gave me half that, I would call Bush the smartest man on earth, lick his balls and yell "pop goes the weasel!"

How much credibility can anyone give you when you make statements like this: "so exceedingly valuable to every white person on this earth." (views on Scientology). Oh maybe because you have incorporated Ufology in your doctrine and so they have the white equivalent? Since only blacks can join your bootleg cult.

"Non-believers and the sinful would face the wrath of God through high-technology UFOs or 'wheels." Where in any Bible, Quran, Book of Mormon, or Watchtower are UFOs? Only in your mind, because they aren't there. It's all make believe and fiction. Next you will claim there is a wizard from the land of Oz that will turn people into stone.

“The first Jewish president.” Obama is a Christian or Muslim Terrorist depending on which news channel you watch. Plus, if Obama were truly a "Jewish" president, so what? Would that be relevant to Israel and Israeli policies? Is that the point that you are trying to make? Right, so that whole spiel that he gave saying that there should be a PALESTINIAN AND ISRAELI STATE and they should co-exist proves that Obama favors Jews. I mean...that's the reason why Netanyahu is continually pissed at the Obama admin. Just read something sometime.

"The Jewish people have said that Hollywood is theirs. Can any of you deny that they are the masters of Hollywood, where sex, lesbianism, homosexuality and violence are promoted?" I have never once heard anyone make that quote from any source Jew or Gentile. Please produce it.  Secondly, sex, homosexuality, lesbianism, and violence is promoted in literature, history, politics, and religious texts and it didn't just pop up in Hollywood from Steven Spielberg  and Woody Allen or some other random Jew over the last 50 years.

"It was Hollywood whose first movie, what was the first movie? – 'The Birth of a Nation.' How did it portray us? And how has Hollywood portrayed us? And who were the Hollywood moguls who portrayed us like that? Am I anti-Semitic or are they anti-black?" You know when that movie came out? 1914. It's 2011. Yes, who were the Hollywood Moguls, produce them. Would you like to produce the actual slave traders or the auctioneers on the plantation in Back Swamp Virginia? And yes, you are in fact anti-semitic, so anti-semitic you make Mel Gibson look like Ghandi by comparison.

"I call them the so-called Jews because to be a Jew you have to adhere to the statutes and laws that create the special relationship. How can you be a Jew and promote homosexual marriage?" You can be a Jew, a Muslim, a Christian or a human being and promote love of your fellow man. That would be nice...promoting homosexual marriage may not be something that you and the others are prepared to attempt, but the dividing line of "us versus them" have to stop. It's tiresome, it's old, it's divisive and it's dangerous.
"But what you have in the Bible has been added to and taken away from by the Jews. Oh here goes this anti-Semite.' This Koran says that the Jews have altered the word of God out of its place. They did not want the masters of the people to know what Jesus really said, what Moses really said, because then you wouldn't have a yardstick to measure their deviations." This is something that anyone with any sense should know. Any book that has been "inspired" by a deity, orally dictated for generations, translated from Aramaic, to Hebrew, to Greek, to Roman, then hand written by scribes has some changes. Some Catholic Priest decides what goes and what stays from the stories, the Bible is translated into English and then again we have schisms within the church, Protestant Reformations, etc...The Quran doesn't need to tell anyone that, all one needs is to be awake and paying attention. This type of thing happened to the Quran as well...again, this is nothing sinister. Most atheists would say, that all religion is a steaming pile of crap for the above reason, but you can't say, "the Bible had things omitted, because the Jews were hiding stuff", when the Quran and EVERY other ancient religious text does the exact same thing. Again, more intellectual dishonesty and it shows that the elevator isn't going to the top floor.

"I'm not into integration. I ain't for that. God told the Jews, he didn't want you intermarrying with others. But you disobeyed him. He don't want us uniting into this that he's come to judge… You can't integrate with wickedness if you want righteousness." Interracial marrying is wickedness? I see. Integration is wickedness? Ok. Again, I don't know what Bible you have read, but it should be set on fire, pissed on, and deemed the rantings of a delusional mind. It's cute that you think that interacial marriage is on par with murder and adultery. You and and all your followers need heavy psychotropic drugs and a buttload of psychiatrists.
White people are potential humans…they haven’t evolved yet." Neither has your understanding of religion, theology, or any of the principles of love that you so call espouse. Anything to make us feel better...Reverse racism at it's finest, yet you claim as loudly as you can, that you are no anti-semite or racist. It blows my mind that anyone can stomach you much less proclaim you as a leader of any type of movement. The only movement that you are fit to lead, is the one that I leave in my toilet.

“Who’s the diamond merchant? Who’s the gold merchant? Who is running Johannesburg and the gold mines and Kimberley and the diamond mines. That’s why in the name jewelry is the name Jew. Because they run the industry.” That must be it! Jew runs the industry because jewelry is in the name. Why are Muslims running the music industry, because the letters mus and i are in the name? Why aren't the Danish better dancers by that logic? I am a female, why don't I have more shoes? Why aren't there alien ant farms that fart purple glow in the dark paint? Let's just throw out random nonsense here. This is almost as bad as a rapper or a pop artist, just stringing together random words, only without the music or auto-tune.

"The Jews have been so bad at politics they lost half their population in the Holocaust. They thought they could trust in Hitler, and they helped him get the Third Reich on the road." The very notion that you think that Jews would assist Hitler in killing their own people is so offensive that it shocks the senses. What history book did you read this from? Were you high when you came up with this? Is that why Freud emigrated to the US? Is that why Einstein emigrated to the US? Why did these learned Jewish scholars leave and head to the unoccupied Europe if they were so called helping Hitler? Here's more history for those of us that didn't pay attention in high school, after Hitler took over occupied Europe those Jews that emigrated: the Doctors, Lawyers, etc.. those Jews were deported and forced into ghetto's and death camps.  How is that helping Hitler get the Third Reich on the Road? You mean by fleeing with their lives as the Gestapo seized their homes and possessions before they loaded them up on the trains to the death camps. Maybe you meant, forcing them to work for hours on end while Hitler tried to develop new technological weapons which developed into NASA? All of those pictures from the liberated camps were all are right...EVERYONE that were there, all the accounts from the Nuremberg Trials were wrong. The Jews set off to murder 5 million of their own people and another million homosexuals, mentally challenged, etc...More intellectual stupidity and historical inaccuracy.

I have no problem with an actual disagreement with the social, economic policies of the United Stated based on facts. If you state that we don't have the resources to continue playing protracted roles militarily in foreign wars, then fine, I can cosign. We have a terrible history in the Middle East with interventionism and playing world police. The way the Western Powers created the state of Israel was absolutely the wrong way, but dreaming up facts or denying facts and having people believe these lies disgusts me and those of us, like me who are growing tired of organized religion. Argue the facts. Sane, rational facts. What I do dislike, is misogynistic, homophobic, racist ranting wrapped in religion and it's not even real Islam. It's pseudo-Islam, a bastardized imitation not rooted anywhere in reality. There are no science labs with Black Scientists creating White people in Sharia or Sunni Islam. There are no UFOs in Sharia or Sunni Islam, there is nothing in any Quran about delusions brought on by white men and your deceased leader circling the earth in a space ship.

Why people listen to you or any incantation of a con artist like you I can't tell you. Your name should be spelled Farracon. You are a snake oil salesman, liar and you promote nothing but ignorance and hate and wrap it the guise of black pride. Yet, you teach inaccurate history and you use deliberate intellectual shortcuts to reach your ridiculous conclusions. I don't know who to feel more sorry for, your followers for believing the constant lies or you for being an opportunistic troglodyte spreading hate and intolerance while you believe your own hype.

2+2=10 in Farrakhan land.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Jefferson County Layoffs to Create an Even More Primitive Back Drop

Stupidity Alert: F-
Just when you think the State of Alabama can't look anymore raggity and craggity, Jefferson County announced layoff's effective saturday thanks to gross mismanagement by the idiots that the electorate continues to elect year after year out of laziness or apathy. So far, 546 layoff letters have been prepared and the good news will keep on coming...The Sherriff decided to decrease the work hours for the deputy's from 40 to 32, so, I guess crime will pay handomely, huh? But I guess that's better than laying off 148 workers, so I can't be mad at Mike Hale for that. Thanks to this fiasco by inept elected monkeys, 177 vacant positions, you know for out of work people like me, were instantly eliminated. Oh...what about the "go out and get a job", when the government kills the jobs you are applying for? You know it's so easy...Silence from the peanut gallery...

What are the consequences for this nonsense? Reduction in the already pathetic excuse in services. Wouldn't it be great to ride down I-65 and not need new shocks? Well thanks to our Jefferson County Commissioners and the uniformed electorate, we no longer have anyone to pave the highway, cut the grass on the highway, or maintain the courthouses. You know how frustrating it is to go pay your tickets with an inept magistrate or a tag office that's understaffed? Yeah...this is our future, way to go "smaller government!" Now the bodies will have better hiding places off the interstate when they make their grand debut on First 48. Here's looking at you Birmingham, you stay classy!

The people that always get's hurt are the workers, making $30k, $40k per year, the support staff, the grunts. It's never the actual commissioner's, the deputy's, the commission president, etc...These clowns get elected time and time again because people vote against their own self interest, or by some Pavlovian name recognition thing. You say their name, and people just salivates and people shut their brain off and fill in the oval. No thinking required... Politicians play on this sense of religion, patriotism, fear and we get mass stupidity on a grand scale. It's always "cut spending", "no more taxes" that's the cure for all problems. Late term abortions, like for ages 50-60 and up or secession from the US are the cure for our problems in the South. This place will never progress past 1960's era and I think most people like it that way...JEFFERSON COUNTY IS THE MOST POPULOUS AREA IN THE STATE! Are you kidding me right now? So now Graysville is doing better than Birmingham? You gotta be joking...Every person that has allowed Jefferson County to disintergrate into the steaming cesspool of stupid that it is, or call themselves a so called leader, or "call me doctor", mayor, commissioner, is WRONG, IGNORANT, AND AN OPPORTUNISTIC PIECE OF TRASH WHO DESTROYED THE PUBLIC'S TRUST. GO PLAY IN TRAFFIC AND GIVE UP YOUR SALARIES! Yeah right...

If only we could immigrate stupid people out of the south instead of the immigrants, however, the people left would think it was the rapture and we would still be left with idiots...

The Emancipation of Mimoo

Mimoo has accomplished so much in her career. Numerous hits, a 7 octave vocal range, surviving a feud with bad boy (snicker), Eminem, taking control of her image and coming out of the flannel shirts, cut off shorts and "emancipating" herself and the most important thing FINALLY ADMITTING SHE IS BLACK. After the divorce from Tommy Mottolla she started humping black chairs, then black rappers, so it's only natural that she admits what she is...She emancipates herself every album with less and less clothing and more and more silicone and cellulite. Her voice has thinned out to the point that she almost whispers and it almost seems that she ages in reverse each year and I don't mean in her face. Now let me go on record by saying that Mariah of today has a better voice than the majority of the so called singers today. However, Mariah of yester year would murder Mariah today and run her and her implants off to a hoarders marathon. Since the power in her voice has diminished and her high notes sound like a cross between air slowly being deflated out of a balloon and a dog screaming for help, I would welcome her twirling in a field in cutoffs and a flannel shirt. The more clothing she had on, the better she sounded. She has an army of hand maidens and servants, that do her bidding and she has her butt boy Nick "tweet fight, I'm going to ruin Eminem's career" blank staring contest Cannon, why can't she dress like someone who isn't trying to dress like Jessica Rabbit/ Diamond from Playa's Club. I mean is there such a thing as street walker couture? If so, Mariah has perfected it, complete with glitter, butterflies, lollipops, and all the bedazzling the eyes can stand without vomiting at all the back fat and thighs.  Everytime you see her, it's like it's her first homecoming dance, too tight top with those boobs stuffed mercilessly in a size 2 dress. They look as if they are screaming for dear life and it's shocking that the implants haven't popped by the restrictive properties of that nonsense she calls "fashion". What is her obsession with spandex? When you are 18 and are a size 2, spandex isn't vulgar, but, when you are 40, and have more bounce to the ounce and you jingle all the way, maybe you should rethink natural fibers. Just because you can Crisco yourself into it, doesn't mean you should wear it.

Has anyone ever noticed that her album titles are always inanimate objects? Charmbracelet, Butterfly, Music Box, she got scientific with E=MC2, like she knows what that means. She and her stupidity is the kind of putrid that I can't stand. Remember when she could sing effortlessly? Not now. Now she is more concerned about being photographed on one side of her face, trying to convince us she can act and that Glitter flopped because of 9/11. As far as movies are concerned, Glitter was almost the 9/11 of all movies, but Battlefield Earth and Gigli just beat her, barely. How did she expect to show depth or emotion being shot on one side of her face? One angle, really?! That's the dumbest crap I ever saw. After her breakdown, she went into full on unicorns and lollipop's mode and began her perfume and fashion line. All that was missing was "Hello Kitty". That seems to be the formula these days. You put out a few albums, a few doesn't do that well, then it's time to get a perfume line. Just because you like clothes and perfume doesn't make you a grand couturier and just because you had hits a decade ago doesn't make you a diva, fatal blossom.

Her new perfume ad has our aging cougar laying down sucking on a hot pink lollipop in a lace trimmed tank top, with "Lollipop Splash Remix" written in bubble letters. Come on...We are in our 40's. This is some crap Britney did when she was 18, over a decade ago. This fragrance is a remix of the first fragrance called "Lollipop Bling" because butt boy Nick hid her engagement ring in a ring pop wrapper. Again...what's with this kid stuff? The high class diva has to take photo's on one side of her face, arrive to hotels by candlelight, but will accept a 17 carat ring in a balled up piece of paper? What a high class diva!

Who is a bigger celebretard media whore, Mariah or J.Lo? That's a tough one...Both have terrible train wreck acting careers, but it seems Mimoo has stayed in her lane, where as J.Lo may be getting ideas in that monumental tookus and trying to stage a comeback. Both have an affinity for banging rappers and dumping them. Eminem, Puffy, Diddy/ Daddy/ Puffy/ P.Diddy, whatever he calls himself now. They both like being blond and write nonsense pop music about their awesomeness and how their love would be there even if their love interest were broke. Yeah...right...They both like being virtually naked, Mimoo takes the stuff to the extreme by dressing in spandex, glittererati, boob busting, sky scraping high Louboutin heels exposing every piece of flesh that only Nick is brave enough to see. Mariah actually has legitimate hits, especially if you count her "real" songs from the 90's, this "touch my body" nonsense and her flop "memoirs of an imperfect angel" where she is playing a barbie with fellow silicone bimbette Nicki Minaj, hopping out of doll boxes, boobs hitting the camera...ugh...J.Lo, has some hits and she can thank the Latin invasion in the early part of the 2000's, her fat behind, whoever she blew to get her record contract and her vomit green Versace dress that went down in infamy.

What's with Mariah's obsession with Marilyn Monroe? I mean, Marilyn was pretty and all, but let's be real here...she was a pill popping alcoholic whore that was probably rubbed out by the mob or one of the Kennedy's. Plus, she couldn't act, sing or dance. Why is it great to idolize bimbo's and talentless idiots? Why would you name your child Monroe after a pill popping mistress? What sense does that make? Does she even know who Marilyn Monroe is, or does only know about "diamonds are a girls best friend". Maybe she just likes the image of a girl half drunk and high, barely stumbling through her lines, standing on a crate and having her dress fly above her head. Great example for her daughter, great example for little girls everywhere. To think little boys have to pick a spouse from a pool made up of trash like that. Let's get the vomit bags ready!

It's fitting her kids have the letters "moron" in their names, both kids have moron in their DNA.