Thursday, September 29, 2011

Sarah Palin's Words of Mass Destruction

Flavor Flav! YO TIME IS UP!

Head cheerleader of the flat earth party Sarah Palin praised businessman and Republican presidential candidate Herman Cain but also called him the "flavor of the week" during an appearance on Fox News' "On The Record" with Greta Van Susteren propaganda/ Scientology show Tuesday night. I guess she would know. Pot meet kettle was all I could think...

"Take Herb Cain. (His name is Herman, Herb Caen was a reporter for the San Francisco Chronicle, it appears she reads after all), Look at why he's doing so well right now. I guess you could say, with all due respect, he’s the flavor of the week," Palin said. According to that book that was written about her, she likes dark chocolate, sexual chocolate.

"Because Herb (His name is still Herman) Cain is the one up there who doesn't look like he's part of that permanent political class," the former  half governor continued,  still fumbling on the candidate's first name. "He came from a working class family. He's had to make it on his own all these years. We respect that." So, the Clown of the Week, Month, Year has something to say about the flavor of the month? Is she jealous that he is stealing her title?

The former CEO of Godfather's Pizza, Cain has managed to defy expectations in his run for the Republican presidential nominee, even notching a surprise win over former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney and Texas Gov. Rick Perry in the Florida straw poll last Saturday. Don't worry, Uncle Ruckus will fade into the wind, because he is the "black friend" to the tea party to try and convince the media that they aren't racists.

I Beat Anorexia, but I'm so over this
Appearing on CBS' "The Early Show" Wednesday, Cain acknowledged that he may be the "flavor of the month," but said voters will find "more to that flavor than meets the eye." I love mixed metaphors...that literally make no sense. Can you see a flavor? I would think that a cooning pizza king would know that. Can you smell the color purple? You should, it's got nappy hair and dark skinned black people who look like runaway slaves that have a better shot of being president than you. Can you say Oprah anyone? She is practically a deity.

In addition to addressing Cain's current standing in the GOP primary, Palin also discussed the threats and fantasies surrounding her own possible candidacy.

"I'm going to keep repeating though, Greta, through my process of decision-making with my family and with my close friends as to whether I should throw my name in the hat for the GOP nomination for 2012: Is a title worth it?" she said, "Does a title shackle a person? Are they -- someone like me, maverick, you know, I do go rogue, and I call it like I see it, and I don't mind stirring it up.... is a title and is a campaign too shackling? Does that prohibit me from being out there, out of the box, not allowing handlers to shape me?" Shackles? Do the shackles come with a leather bustier, a ball gag perhaps?

What? Whats the matter boo boo, Sarah, cant ya read the notes written on your hands?? LMAO.. no one need bother doing a caricature of Sarah....every time she opens that pie hole she c­ontinues to do it all by her little lonesome: Herb, going rogue and all mavericky. For one who gripes about Spanish speakers, her English is abhorrent. If you only speak one language, you shouldn't suck at it, Caribou Barbie. Nicki Minaj, you better take a seat, Sarah Palin is the original Barbie.

Here is my poem dedicated to the little rogue maverick, maggot, barracuda:

Sarah, standing next to the curb
'Bout pizza guy had a little blurb
She had trouble stopping
Thinking 'bout toppings
That's why she called him a Herb

Maybe when she says something in her critiques about the candidate from "Nantucket" then another poem will follow.

Let's run it through the Palinomete­r and see what that comes out, translated into English:

"I'm not running because I can't find anyone who wants to become my campaign manager. Every last one I approach calls me "unmanagea­ble" just because I enjoy spouting off completely fabricated nonsense intended to disguise the fact that I am woefully uninformed on the issues reporters frame their questions about. Not only am I uninformed­, I refuse to become informed and brandish my ignorance as a badge of honor. In short, I won't run for POTUS because I can't run without an organized campaign and I can't organize an effective campaign because no-one wants to manage a candidate who makes 100 to 1 odds look really attractive­."

Besides, there's more money and self-flatt­ering fame to be had as a Cluster Faux News contributo­r and pretend potential candidate - why on earth would she give up that sweet gig to take on all the actual work a serious campaign would demand? Will she actually sit down and study micro economics to learn how the economy works? Please...Don't mistake Palin for someone with principles - she just plays one on TV. I don't think anyone is buying that rotten bill of goods.

Beehive hairdo, cheap fleece top, bedazzled flag pin and she is making excuses about why she won't run? Here is the truth Caribou: YOU CAN"T WIN and you know it. Did you see Palin deep throating a corn dog in Iowa?  That was her crazed eyed clone Bachmann along with her Tutti Fruity husband. Silly Sistah Sawah pops out of her moose house to flibber flubber her spaced out comments to her equally "challenge­d" followers who follow her every word, to only show how dim and uninformed she truly is....Run Sarah..ple­ase...we miss our daily belly laughs and giggles, the only problem is she doesn't speak in complete sentences.

News Flash: Sarah, the minute you quit your job as governor, you stopped being a maverick at all. You simply became another fame-hungr­y grifter. Nothing particular­ly unusual about that, you are no different than the cast of Jersey Shore. Repeating the word maverick doesn't make it true. You just can't change stupid. It wouldn't be so hard to make up your mind about running for POTUS if you actually HAD a mind.

It's an empty space, no damage

She can hold her breath longer than most people due to the extra reserve of air she keeps in her head.  

No comments: