Thursday, June 21, 2012

Rihanna Begins 7th Studio Abortion

Rihanna
Off My Meds


In true Rihanna fashion, new hair color, new fake controversy, means a new useless album set to disgrace shelves for the upcoming holiday season.


 Arriving in London yesterday, the model has enlisted the help of an elite team of songwriters and producers to craft the product. Songwriters, which include ‘Think Like A Man’ maestro Eric Bellinger and serial hit maker Sean Garrett. What this means is that this will be a hit focused album with no cohesive direction, as usual.


Though a release for the LP is yet to be confirmed, it will be most likely released right around Thanksgiving, just like the other monstrosities that she puts out. Why? Kiddie fans get ipods or other mp3 players for Christmas gifts, what do their unwitting parents and grandparents load on these devices from the the itunes app store or amazon? Rihanna, Katy Perry or their add water disposable pop music and it pads their album sales and it makes it look like they are doing better than they are. Remember, they don't calculate album status by album sales, it's by units shipped, these clowns have perfume lines now. What do you think they put as a free gift with purchase in their perfume gift sets? If you guess their albums, you would guess correctly. Rihanna had her Flop ThaT Flop in her Reb'l Fleur and Rebelle sets last holiday and I bet she will have her new album in her new perfume set coming out this holiday season. That nobody but the navy will buy.

rihanna-geishaWhat can we expect from Ms. Fenty this holiday season? Will she finally create, write, develop, produce, direct, or will she do what she always does, hire a team to do everything for her. Will she have developed some artistic integrity in 7 albums? Will there be one song, just one, where she isn't just repeating a line over and over, or worse one word, "cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake, cake," anyone? 


Imitation Thug
Will Rihanna actually stop chasing the next fad and attempting to try and outdo everyone or will she for once actually put forth real effort or will we get the same auto tuned goat, lazy "eh, yeah, oh, nah, baby", where she is talking about how good she is in bed, how much of a thug she is, how hard she is, but how she really wants someone to understand her and love her for who she is while having kinky rough sex. Why she is making a 7th album after Talk That Talk has underperformed is beyond me. Remember when Rihanna could fart in a mic and it could be a top ten single? Now, not so much. She is more known for the train wreck that is her life than her so called music. It seems that musically, she peaked with Loud, and it's like the media didn't get the memo.They just want to force us into being interested into her every move or into loving her so called style. I just want to write US Weekly and tell them, Rihanna is a cheap imitation of numerous other artists from the 80's, nothing she does is interesting, groundbreaking or unique. Every interview is just as brainless as the last, so for god sakes stop it. If you want to use her as a mastabatory aid, then fine, but please stop making her talk or worse sing.She is only tolerable with the volume down, anything she has to say will be of no value to the world so there is basically no point of interviewing her. Don't believe me, read her twitter feed. She's a thug, who drinks, go to strip clubs, curses people out, loves the c-word, posts naked photos of herself, posts photos of herself smoking weed, and the list of stupidity goes on and on. 

Rihanna LoudWho will she be this so called "era", will she recycle herself and become Rihanna from her Island of the Sun Days? There aren't many more hair colors to go through, so , not sure what she is going to do for this one, all she can do is have more whorish and extreme personality shifts that her fans will call unique but we all know are a knockoff of Grace Jones and a bad imitation at that. 


What the world will be cursed with is yet another mass microwavable, over produced piece of desperate fluff and a pathetic attempt to remain on the highway of fame. It's sad that music has become a fast food industry and Rihanna is Mayor McCheese.
I'm Dead Inside

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

You should really consider being a publisher for magazines. You're extremely talented and maybe you could open a few eyes with your articles. I'm 16 and and I'm taking AP Literature next year and the way you write is incredible and has helped me rethink the way that I should write. Good Luck!

Rebel Flower said...

Thank you anonymous, that's real nice of you. I just like to have fun

Matthew Winston said...

Well, at least you know she's the mayor.

Blogger said...

I have just downloaded iStripper, and now I enjoy having the sexiest virtual strippers stripping on my taskbar.