Praise the Lord and Pass the Ammo

I couldn't make this up if I wanted to...

A minister of music tased at a church in the St. Elmo Community, a boondock place in the nether regions of Alabama, Mobile to be exact, tased the pastor who just fired him on Sunday, touching off a fight and various knife slashing. Apparently, the Reverend told the Minister of Music that his services were no longer needed and gave him his final paycheck. A disagreement broke out about the amount of the check, tithes must down...and an argument broke out. Sexy girlfriend, The Music Minister as his final resort/ pathetic act of desperation, tased the Reverend. Really?! You know the Music Minister's  momma got involved and suffered a stab wound at the hand of the Deacon ( a church leader). What type of phuckery is this, when the church leadership is armed? When asked why the Music Minister was carrying a tazer on a Sunday, he responded, "I didn't trust the situation". What the hell type of south central type of hood do you live in where the minsters have to have weapons? Church's need metal detector's now like the court house, air ports and high school's? TSA agents are now going to pat us down at church? I already feel shaken down when they pass the collection plate 4 times, now I have to get felt up by some the same bouncer with corn rows I saw last night at the club?

Ms. Thang said he was ready to leave as minister of music, but wanted to give two weeks notice and get paid for that time. That's good, shake down the church...He maintained that the chairman of the deacon board agreed to that arrangement.

His  description of the Sunday events was as follows:

He was asked to meet with the pastor and deacons after services and was told he was being let go. His mother went with him into the meeting. So, we aren't old enough to handle a big boy meeting, you need momma to come with you? Please...The deacons told her to leave, but he told her to stay put. You know she was disruptive, ghetto, and in the way... A deacon wrote sexy back a check for $300 and handed it to him. Home girl said the amount was incorrect.

Don't Taze Me Bro!

Lady boy said that two deacons told him that they would not pay another $600 that he believed was due him.

He claimed that the men grabbed him and he struggled with them, and that one the Deacon pulled out a knife with a black handle.

He said that his mother, ran for help, bringing back his 53-year-old brother with back up, he said that he received cuts to his forehead and little finger on his right hand that required a combined nine stitches. He said that his mother received 19 stitches for a stab wound to her hand. This is church, not the mafia.
This moron ran for the Democratic nomination for US Senate in 2010, another piece of the puzzle...

Of course the Pastor has another side of the story:

The meeting with Lady Boy was held in the conference room in the church’s all-purpose building. Charlatan said that Lady Boy became angry and demanded another $600.

“The deacons and myself said we were not going to pay him because this Sunday was supposed to be his last. Once you are terminated, we are no longer under any obligation for any other funds to be paid to an employee,” The charlatan said. “At that point, he pointed the Taser at me.”
The charlatan said he was Tased twice on his left arm. He said that Lady Boy also struck random Deacon in the head with a money box. Is this a bank robbery? The Deacon received two cuts that required 32 stitches, he said.
Riley said that Thug Momma would not have been injured if she had left the meeting. He said he believes she was cut by a knife that Lady Boy's brother was carrying.
“He had a long, 18-inch knife. I believe it was her son that cut her because he was swinging erratically,” Charlatan said.
When asked whether it might have been more prudent to send Lady Boy a termination letter with the check inside, Charlatan answered, “I would have taken that approach, but the deacons wanted to meet with him privately and in person, and I yielded to their suggestion.” I guess mom's ruined that plan...

Vengeance is mine saith the Lord. Were they doing the Lord's work or the Devil's? Is this a church or the script for the "Game is to Be Sold Not to be Sold"? I know, this is the new version of Scarface, or Godfather Part V. Who brings weapons to church? They must be serving Maddog 20/20  or Wild Irish Rose as the communion wine for this to go on. Is anyone welcome at that church? What happened to come as you are? Should we make bracelets saying "who would Jesus tase and who would Jesus stab?" Is this the black version of Westboro Baptist Church? This all just to funny, Minster of music tases pastor. Then,  a deacon stabs the minister of music's mom, I can feel the love of Christ here...Yes, the doors of the church are open has a whole new meaning. Everyone in church "leadership" should get under the altar for this one, because they are obviously not fit to lead a bake sale at a prison rodeo much less a church. There has been exactly one Christian and He died on the cross, pointeth out Nietzsche.

Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "Don't taze me BRO"