Sunday, November 6, 2011

Open Letter to Vivica Fox

Dear Vivica,

Sperm Dumpster
Aunt Viv...or  phony Cougar Viv...Please stop. Do you ever watch any of your movies? Do your ever follow any of your ghetto advice? Why do you keep allowing yourself to be pumped and dumped by young men? They don't like you for your personality. Ever notice that in 6-8 months every guy you date issues a press release stating that the chemistry isn't there, you both parted as friends, flaws can outweigh the relationship, and you wish each other the best. Translation: YOUR FUNDS ARE GETTING LOW AND HE NEEDS TO HIT THE DUSTY TRAIL OR THE YOUNGER COOCH.  Please accept the inevitable Aunt Viv, YOU ARE GETTING OLDER. Also, another translation is " YOU GOT TO MUCH MOUTH ON YOU AND NONE OF THE GOOD MOUTH." No amount of nipping, tucking, and sucking a man 20 years younger than you will make you younger. It seems like you have a slow learning curve and you expect to make the same mistake over and over and think you will get a different outcome. You know what that's called Aunt Viv? Insanity. How many more will hit it and quit it? Is there any more tread on the tire?

You are pushing 50 now and now your 28 year old fiance of 10 months has left you high and dry, or should I say in the cold wet spot in the middle of the bed in a seedy motel. You probably are stuck paying the fees for the room. He stated: "She's a good woman, it's just one of those situations where in life people outgrow each other. I'm highly intelligent, very wise and one thing I hate is negativity and drama. I hate arguing and I value communication no matter what the problem so as in any relationship tension can build up and I finally had to walk away." Deja vu isn't it? First clue that someone is not highly intelligent or very wise when they are the ones saying it.
It makes you sound stupid because YOU cant judge yourself and by announcing your "findings" robs the people who do the judging of their opinion/vo­te.

 If he were truly "highly intelligent" and "wise" he wouldn't have released such a ridiculous statement.

What are you going to do? You are the new growing breed of black over 40 black women, damaged by drama, self imposed drama, have never healed emotionally, and will call on God when their life isn't working. What's the next step? Going lesbian now? These young men are telling you to fall back like hairline!

If you are claiming to be a cougar by any stretch of the imagination, then I am here to refute all of these erroneous claims. You and your wig collection can go sit down!


Anonymous said...

So what are those bruises on her inner thighs that are showing?? Not cool for a woman her age.

Anonymous said...

All Good points!!