Friday, July 27, 2012

Kristen Stewart Cheats on Her Vampire, Fake Publicity Stunt


Kristen Stewart
I Have One Facial Expression
Back in May, I remember this human corpse telling a reporter in Elle magazine one of the most ridiculous lines that I have ever seen. This one line was so stunningly stupid that it makes the collective works of Beyonce, Rihanna, Soulja Boy, Drake, and Nicki Minaj seem I don't know, enlightened and articulate by comparison.

This Muppet says: “You can learn so much from bad things. I feel boring. I feel like, Why is everything so easy for me? I can’t wait for something crazy to f—ing happen to me. Just life. I want someone to f— me over! Do you know what I mean?” No. Fool, I don't.That's called being an idiot. Who voluntarily wants to suffer when they don't have to?

Kristen Stewart
I'm Really a Zombie
While I agree that every movie that she has ever played in is excruciatingly boring and Twilight turned Vampires gay, stupid, crazy and immature who just whisper on screen, more than likely from embarrassment that they are in a movie where vampires sparkle. However, why would anyone who was listed as the highest paid actress, basically for staring blankly at a camera, with her lips parted, wish for something bad to happen? Well, K-Stew, be careful what you wish for...cause it's time to go to school.

Looks like madame hot pants has been getting it on with her Snow White and the Huntsman Director and as a result cheating on her not that sexy boyfriend Rob Pattinson or Edward Cullen for you Twihards out there. (Let's face it, that's who he will be for the rest of his life). Photos of Kristen and a very married Rupert Sanders leaked of them making out in her car while wearing her vampire boyfriends baseball cap. How foul is that?

Kristen released a hamfisted apology that sounded like a sophomoric attempt to get attention from Robert, since he has been operating on radio silence and moved out of the house they share right before the story went public.

 "I'm deeply sorry for the hurt and embarrassment I've caused to those close to me and everyone this has affected. This momentary indiscretion has jeopardized the most important thing in my life, the person I love and respect the most, Rob. I love him, I love him, I'm so sorry."

No mention of the wife and kids of the married man you just had your indescretion with. Just you and the thing you have going on, that's what's the most important thing. Oh, but you wanted something crazy to happen to you. You wanted to have some type of tragic event to happen to you, because success, money, fame, peace, love with the man you want to marry, that's just too much, But you didn't have actual intercourse, so it's not really cheating, so that's OK, right? Or, was this a violation of the "beard contract"? I'm not convinced of his hetero status, but it doesn't matter to me. I think there is a red carpet at Rob Pattinson's closet waiting for one of his designer shoes to hit it when he opens the door, but that's just a theory of mine...

This is yet another fake publicity stunt to drum up interest for the last Twilight Movie. They know that Twilight brings out the devout fans but there are more people like me who think the movie are for retarded 12 year olds and pathetic 40 year olds that want to reclaim their lost dream of being head cheerleader. This fake controversy is out of the new Hollywood playbook, fight someone, show naked photos of yourself, sleep with someones husband or boyfriend, wear crazy clothes, start a beef with someone, join a cult, gain weight, lose a lot of weight, get a weird tattoo, become bisexual, throw a phone at someone, anything other than let your work stand on it's own merit.

Kristen Stewart
Zombie and Vampire, or Twinkles and  Beard
I can guarantee that these rodeo clowns will "reconcile" right before Twilight is released into the ethos and finally the balance of the force can return where Vampires can once again become cool.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Definitely a publicity stunt to promote the last twilight movie.

Lila said...

This is the best fucking take on this horse shit I have read so far. This is so obviously staged it's not funny. These PR stunts have become so played out, I can't understand why people continue to buy into it. And news just in "Liberty Ross has decided to forgive husband Rupert Sanders for silly fling with Kristen Stewart". That was mighty quick. These fools all need to disappear. Oh yeah, LMFAO @ rodeo clowns.

Anonymous said...

Wow, I've been saying the same thing from the begining...Its all fake!!! They needed something to spice up the upcoming movie. I'm sick of the whole thing already.

Anonymous said...

I agree with everything except "pathetic 40 year olds that want to reclaim their lost dream of being head cheerleader". :)

Anonymous said...

Definitely a publicity stunt. They've been discreet for years then before this stunt Stewart stupidly claims she wants something bad to happen to her. A video comes out revealing a very intimate interaction between Stewart and Pattinson at an after party in Cannes. Stewart who is known to despise paparazzi and flips them off frequently is now photographed staring right into the camera in broad daylight then proceeds to make out with a married man publicly?? She then releases a public statement apologizing to Rob and proclaiming her love for him? Oh and lets not forget that Pattinson stated in an interview this year that he doesnt underdtand prople who cheat and that when he's in a relationship he is in 100%. And now the icing on the cake is her interview with Vogue and her statement that her boyfriend likes to lick her under her armpits. Give me a break!! This is staged and nothing more than a team of PR geniuses creating an ongoing buzz to spark a LOT of attention to keep people plugged in to everything associated with the final Twilight movie, and it's certainly not hurting the Snow White franchise as well as the recent Indie movies that Stewart and Pattinson starred in ""Cosmopolis" and "On the Road" - none of this is a coincidence. Too many people are benefiting from all this media hype.

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