Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Rihanna Finally Tired of Blowing Chris Brown

I never thought this day would come...
Queen Poser


The perpetual slutty martyr with the voice of a tortured cat who has done nothing but evoke sympathy for the sake of turning water into wine these last 3 torturous years of lazy music has finally decided to shut the hell up about the beat down heard round the world.

Trying Hard to Be Sexy, But Not Really Being Sexy
During her sit-down interview with Esquire U.K., Rihanna was more than miffed when the interviewer brought up the controversy surrounding her remixes with ex Chris Brown. Brown made headlines in 2009 for physically abusing the "Love the Way You Lie" singer stripper-- an incident many of Rihanna's fans refuse to forgive Brown for. An incident that she has beaten to death anytime she needed just a little bit of attention right before one of her auto tuned sub standard pieces of fluff assaulted the airwaves and her mindless fans hit the download button and added money to her coffers which should be labeled as state funded terrorism.

"Some people felt it sent the wrong message ... You'd gone back to someone who put you in the hospital," the interviewer said.

rihanna "Oh really? Did I?" Rihanna shot back. "Did I? Did I? Did I? ... (signs of ghetto defensiveness). Okay. In a completely professional environment. And on a complete professional note. I mean, if I went back to him [as a girlfriend], then that’s a whole different discussion ... I think a lot of people jumped to an assumption that was incorrect and they ended up looking stupid." So, being called an industry whore in song, just oodles class right? Having lots of sex and taking stupid photos while flipping off the camera equals professional.

But when the Esquire writer continued to press the singer about how it is difficult for the public to separate her professional decisions and musical output from her personal life, Rihanna went into fight mode.

"This is turning into a tacky interview,"
Rihanna said in her Ms. Cleo accent. "What do you really want to talk about? I’m not here to [talk] about messy s**t ... It upsets me that you keep asking the same kind of questions about stuff that’s trivial. What’s there to talk about? Are all your questions like that?"
Pimps Up, Hoes Down
  So let me get this straight, she didn't want to talk about Chris Brown, while simultaneously talking about him. Sounds like our little homecoming thug. Was she upset that she missed her latest round of naked photo shoots for the day? Did the crack dealer, I'm sorry, coke dealer not make it? For the next interview, she should have her daily toke so she can be much friendlier, or maybe she was upset that Battleship was sunk and there is nothing left to exploit. For three years she has done nothing but discuss "the incident". Single sales slide? Talk about Chris Brown. Magazine article coming out? Talk about Chris Brown. Get drunk or dumped? Blame Chris Brown. It's been her PR tactic for 3 years and it's given her amazing success. Rihanna is as dumb as a sack of bricks or a pile of her wigs and nail clippings by calling this subject matter "trivial". She has kept this topic of her assault on the public conscience for 3 years, she has kept the image of her bruised and battered face fresh in the minds of the world as she stripped and sang off key with the facial expression of a department store mannequin. The person that once said that she took her role as a role model seriously must find it hard with a nappy blonde wig and the blue contact she puts in her glazed over eyes. 

Rihanna Doing What She Does Best, Stripping
Rihanna has whined and begged for attention. Non stop attention and pity to be exact and now she wants to have a ghetto bitch attitude when a topic that was up for grabs and has been for years, is now taboo. You got your attention babe, now you don't want it? You instagram 1,000 topless photos of yourself, you get naked in every magazine, you get naked walking down the street, solely for attention. Now, you don't want it? When you go back to work with the man that abuses you and the topic of the songs are sex, fellatio, and cunnilingus, then the bad personal choices are to become material for interviewers. Seems she forgot her mantra: when all else fails take off your top or grab and point at your crotch.

RihannaRihanna is about a year away from a crash. She is a far less talented Whitney Houston who makes the same mistakes all the time but hopes for different results. You know what that's called? Insanity. She will go to rehab or be killed in some jealous rage and she will still be laughed about by all the guys in the industry that passed her around but mistakenly believes she is "empowered". Maybe it's time to let the "Rude Boy's" go boo boo, but what am I saying, that would mean that Rihanna actually learned something from the event that she has been pimping for the last 3 years.

This non talent Bratz Doll prototype should enjoy these so called "tacky" interviews, because when these go, this poor excuse for entertainment will fade into oblivion. 

Li Li Lick You Like a Lollipop Breezy

1 comment:

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